As leaders, we need develop and maintain a strong, positive culture within our companies.  To help us do this, we need to stop criticizing so much!! 

“The first order of business should be to eliminate the negative, not accentuate the positive.”  Robert Sutton (Management Professor)

The Allure of Criticism

For most of us, it is far easier to criticize someone than to praise them.  First, being a critic makes us feel smarter (and we all like to feel smarter).  As Teresa Amabile, a scholar on creativity and motivation, writes:

When people hear negative, critical views, they regard them as inherently more intelligent than optimistic ones; when we’re trying to seem smart to others, we tend to say critical, negative things.

Second, criticizing someone deflects responsibility away from ourselves.  It is too easy for us to criticize our team’s poor performance without looking at our own roles in that poor performance: Did we communicate the objectives clearly and timely?  Did we provide the team with all the necessary resources and support to achieve the objective?  Did we follow up consistently to ensure the team was on the right track?

The Problem with Criticism

It is no surprise to anyone that negativity and criticism weigh more heavily on us than compliments and positivity.  Research suggests that to maintain a neutral position, we need our positive sentiments to outweigh our critiques by 3 to 1.  As Psychology Researcher Martin Seligman has determined:

Companies and relationships that are above a 2.9:1 ratio for positive statements and comments to negative statements and comments are flourishing.  Below that ratio (the Losada ratio), companies and relationships are not doing well.

This means that we need to dole out 3 compliments for every one criticism.

With less than this 2.9 to 1 positive to negative ratio, our teams will perceive us as always being negative.  In more dramatic cases, when we are constantly criticizing or being negative the criticism gets ignored because that is all that is heard, and any compliment gets ignored because that is just a brief exception from the sheer negativity.

The Critic’s Response

All you critics out there are thinking… 

How do I get people to improve if I don’t call out their poor behavior or mistakes?

Yes, we still need to evaluate and critique performance.  With good performers, however, we need to ensure that we give plenty of compliments so that the critique is heard or internalized.  For weaker performers, we may have to be more consistently critical.  But this should happen only for a short time.  If the critiques are frequent and we have fully and clearly communicated our expectations, then it is time to let the person go.  In a successful, positive company, consistent poor behavior and performance cannot be tolerated.

Creating a Less Critical Company Culture

To ensure that our positive comments massively outweigh our negative comments we need to…

• Have the Right People on the Team: the right people on any team are those that rarely need to be criticized as they will be beating themselves up for their mistakes far stronger than we would ever do so. 
• Create the Right Culture: We want a culture where we focus on the quality of the decisions and the actions and not on the outcomes.  Mistakes happen and circumstances change so that even the best plans can fail.  Such a culture will also be focused on learning from our mistakes.  If we criticize someone for failing when trying something new, they will stop trying something new.
• Overlook the Small Stuff: We need to overlook small non-essential errors and imperfections to focus only on what is important.  As Pope John XXIII commented:

See everything; overlook  a great deal; correct a little.

• Avoid the “But”: When we give compliments, we need to give compliments.  Full Stop.  Compliments with “but” or “what about” will be heard as criticism.  The compliment will be forgotten and the criticism that comes after the “but” or the implied criticism for “what about” will be all that will be remembered.
• Finding Someone Doing Something Right: This old line to find someone doing something right every day and then complimenting and then thanking remains as essential today as when it was first quoted decades ago.
• We Still Need to Criticize (When needed):  To have a positive culture, there needs to be accountability for lapses of judgment or poor behavior.  In such situations, we need to criticize the employee or the team (while taking responsibility for any poor communication or actions on our part).  When surrounded by many positive comments, our good employees will take the criticism to heart and up their game.

Conclusion

By following these suggestions above, we will create a more positive and a more enjoyable workplace. Moreover, we will be able to attract and retain stronger, more engaged employees who will help move our companies forward.

Finally, criticizing less in our business will help us to criticize less in our personal lives and that will just make us happier overall. 

“To be a good partner…what’s crucial is avoiding the negative.  Being able to hold your tongue rather than say something nasty or spiteful will do much more for your relationship than a good word or deed.”  Roy Baumeister (Social Psychologist)